What has your child done that is technically “wrong” but you were proud of them for doing it? A few years ago, I got a call from my son’s principal in grade 6. I was told there was an important issue that had to be dealt with in person. As I was an hour away seeing a client, my son would have to wait until I got there in “The Quiet Room”…When I arrived at the office, the principal summoned my son and proceeded to inform me that my son had pushed another kid. I am not one to condone violence, however something didn’t seem right, so I asked for more details about the incident. The principal told me the details were UNIMPORTANT as the school had a ZERO TOLERANCE policy when it came to violence! I explained to him that without knowing the facts I would not be able to give my son the proper punishment. The principal again objected, so I finally asked my son for his side of the story. It turns out the child my son had pushed was BEATING UP a classmate who was confined to a wheelchair. My son pushed the bully to stop him from hurting the kid in a wheelchair!
After speaking with several parents at this school, I discovered this principal had a history of enforcing rules WITHOUT considering context. I asked the principal if this was true and he corroborated my son’s story. I was STUNNED. The principal then informed me that my son will have to serve a one day suspension.
I was getting a little upset at this point but I managed to keep calm. I thought for a few seconds and looked at my son and said, “tomorrow you and I are going to get up early and we are going for breakfast. After that I am taking you to the video game store as soon as it opens and you can buy ANY game you want. You can spend the rest of the day playing video games.” The principal looked SHOCKED at my response and said, “I am trying to teach your son a lesson here and you are undermining my authority! We have a zero tolerance policy for physical violence and you are sending the wrong message!” I looked at the principal and explained it was HIM who was sending the wrong message and that my son’s only alternative to allowing the bully to beat up a wheelchair bound child was to push him away. I explained that had my son escalated the situation I would be more upset, however he didn’t. Ironically, I was able to use this principal’s overreaction as a valuable lesson. I explained to my son that sometimes even when you do the RIGHT thing there will be consequences.

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administrator